Just A Little January

Well, it happened.  As predicted, Jes crumpled.  She cranked the heat at the stroke of January.
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It's been a month since I've written anything about our heatless lives.  A whole month!  We made it through December.  While the holiday temperatures couldn't measure up to our Halloween nightmare, it was still quite the challenge.  Throughout the whole month, we continually reassured each other that there would be no shame in clearing off the radiators and turning the thermostat to above freezing, but nobody wanted to be the little girl that cracked first. 

Extreme measures.

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I think it's pretty decent that we made it this long.  Throughout our challenge, we've learned a couple of things about living in a tundra.  We've made a list.
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Jes:
1.  Mind over matter.  Pretend the only old sweatshirt you could find on your closet floor is doing anything to keep you from freezing.  Forget about buying new, warmer clothes - we can't even afford to heat the bathroom.
2. A wet towel will remain wet for the remainder of the winter.
3. Perk: Sleeping huddled into a ball for warmth prevents sleepless thrashing.
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Nicole:
1. Perk: The ice cubes in your soda will never melt.  Conversely, if you set your coffee mug on any piece of furniture, it will freeze on contact.
2. Showering became both the best and absolute worst part of the day.
3. Cuddling up to any living thing, willing or otherwise, is acceptable when you can see your breath on the couch.
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Kelly:
Kelly learned nothing.  She wasn't even slightly inconvenienced.  
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These few months have been pretty okay.  There's something about shared misery that is just funny.  Thanks for sticking with us!  I can't say anyone was supportive, though.  Mostly people gave us weird looks, and told us we were silly.  
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Until next year! 

That snow storm really happened, right?

Alright, November, what gives?  I wore a t-shirt today, and I saw children in flip flops.  I have to say, I'm disappointed.  Sure, we lived some hell in October, but this isn't No Heat October.  That's a terrible name.  I just wanted you to know that I had high hopes for you, and a healthy respect for your chilly wrath - but now?  You're kind of a pansy.  You've lost your moxy.  I hardly recognize you.
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So, as you can see, Readers, we're nearing the end of the challenge with little difficulty.  It's not as sweet as I thought it would be.  We'll reach December without even having to put slippers on.  I haven't worn gloves in my office for weeks.  I've switched back to cold drinks.  I don't want to die when I step out of the shower anymore.  I'm sure I don't have to tell you how much this upsets me.
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So, we have decided as a house that we're going to extend No Heat November.  Look out, December.  We're ready for you.  We've been ready all month.  (This also means that probably none of our friends will be visiting for another month.)
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I won't be posting as much throughout December - how many times can I tell you I'm cold before you start to hate me?  Just know we're here.  I bet you the temperature will unexpectedly drop tomorrow night, and I'll hate my life and regret ever agreeing to extend this silly challenge.

Be Prepared.

(I hope that anyone who would read my blog would also hear that title sung by a lion.)
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When did November get so busy?  It's been a while, Readers, but that doesn't mean we've caved and turned up the heat.  We had a week of pretty gorgeous weather, though, so we all got a little complacent.  It still amazes me that it can be 65 degrees outside, but you still feel like you might lose your fingers if you stay still for too long in the living room.  So in this post, I wanted to talk little bit about preparing for a heatless winter.
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As I've said before, a big part of why we wanted to do this challenge was to find little ways to lower our cost of living that we would otherwise be too lazy to think about.  But if anyone out there is considering participating in this challenge next year, don't be stupid and let your pipes freeze.  That's a lot more expensive than the few bucks you'll save.  A lot of crazy people who choose to stay cold for this month do smart things like insulating their pipes with crazy things like heat tape or heat cables.  Or, if you're not freezing mastermind, newspaper and tin foil.  Letting the faucets drip overnight is also recommended, but that's on those super-cold nights that we usually don't see this month.  Apparently, you're also supposed to seal any windows or cracks that are near your pipes, because that cold wind coming through your walls is no joke.
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I didn't know any of this. And I don't have half the motivation it takes to winterize your house.  Luckily, though, I also didn't realize that our landlord has had our basement pipes wrapped in foil since we moved in 2 years ago.  We're not hardcore enough to really risk our pipes bursting, though.  It is a seriously old house, and I don't even want to think about the other problems we'd uncover in the bursting process.  So in addition to our tin foil, we leave the thermostat set at an uncomfortable, but not pipe-freezing temperature.  I figure this isn't cheating because even if the heat kicks in, the level we have it set at doesn't even warm our radiators.  (Which is good, because most of them are covered in all sorts of flammable things right now.)
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I've read a bunch about what happens when your pipes do freeze, and it sounds like an awful experience.  My advice on what you should do if this happens to you?  Cry.  I won't judge you.
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Tomorrow, Jes and I are going to cover all of our windows with plastic.  If you've got terrible windows like we do, you should be doing this too!  It's the single most effective way we survive our winters, and it's super easy (unless you're us).  If you're interested, you could read some about this at Planet Green.   
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It's cold!  Don't be dumb about this ridiculous contest.  All I know is that it's got to be cold, because my hyperactive spazz of a dog is suddenly content to cuddle with me and is acting like it's not weird.

Sleep is sweeter when you earn it.

It has been so warm!  I would worry that this would mean I would have nothing to write about, but luckily, my ice-castle is impervious to 70 degree weather.  It's been pretty frigid in here.  Actually, the house is just catching up to the warmth today - but don't worry, Readers, temperatures are due to start dropping again tomorrow.
 
I had a whole different post that I was going to put up, but I can feel my toes today, so I'm feeling ambitious.  I wanted to tell you about how we've had to change our sleeping habits.  It's really easy to become bitter and irritable when you're not getting enough sleep because of a stupid self-inflicted challenge.  We've had to adapt to our new environment in order to not become raging crazies.  
 
Tip #1: Wear socks to bed.  Kelly practically gagged at the thought of this.  I don't get it.  I'm a pretty regular sock wearer.  But I know a lot of people aren't.  And to you, I say: Get over it, or you will lose the toes you so vehemently want to keep bare.  Probably.  I may be overreacting.
 
Tip #2: Put a fleece blanket under your comforter.  This is heaven.  If not for No Heat November, I would never know the joy of this combination.
 
Tip #3: Iron your sheets.  Don't laugh at me.  Kelly and Jes did.  But I know better.  It's even better than fleece.  It's like crawling into a dryer with all those warm clothes, except I imagine it hurts less.  If any less than half of you go and try this tonight, I'll be surprised.
 
Tip #4: Warmth in numbers.
 
This is how more than a few of my mornings have gone lately:

That's Jes' favorite spot.  I actually don't know how she manages to squeeze herself into the middle so consistently.  But anyway, this is what we've sunk to.  Huddled together under a fleece blanket and a down comforter, trying to coax the dogs up to cuddle with us, but they will not be coaxed.  First of all, Shanna refuses to cuddle because it is undignified.  Also, she hates her little sister, Emma.  I have seen them lay together maybe three times in the year we've had Emma, and Shanna pouted the whole way through.  Ever seen a german shepherd pout?  I have. 

 

 I can't say I blame her, though.  Really, who would want to cuddle with this?

 

(Answer: I do.)

Things you didn't know could freeze: Face wash.

Five days in and we're going strong!


And by strong, I mean I've developed a kind of worrying attachment to my slippers.  Like, I couldn't find them today when I got home from work and I almost threw a hissy fit.  BUT, November is not as cold as October was.  The snow has melted, and Kelly and I have retired the frump.  We've downgraded to 24/7 sweatshirts.  


Jes came home from England, and now it is pretty commonplace to walk into the living room and find her and Kelly clinging to each other for warmth.  Or maybe it's something to do with their surplus of emotion.  I don't know.


However, I learned this year that November is the month for challenges.  Maybe it's the impending holiday season that makes people feel the need to prove themselves.  I'm trying to take part in NaNoWriMo this year, which is proving difficult based on the fact that I can't sit in my office without wearing two pairs of gloves and a fleece blanket.  Seriously, it's awful in here.  


ALSO, my very dear friend, Margaret, is starting her own monthly cooking challenge - which will be accompanied by a blog (when she gets off her lazy grad student ass) that I will shamelessly promote here even though it has nothing to do with No Heat November.  Except that you cook with heat.  So maybe I will only promote it on the basis of warm kitchen jealousy.  But really, it's going to be great.  I can't remember the last time I ate food that didn't come out of a little plastic container, so my admiration for her cooking challenges is sincere.  

Only Just Beginning

Happy Halloween!  I kind of can't believe the No Heat November challenge hasn't even officially started yet.  I think the end of October was testing us.  The last couple days have been filled with snow storms and below freezing temperatures.  However, the beginning of November calls for much more reasonable weather.  It was like a teaser trailer for what's to come. 

Kelly and I have been getting by with a lot of hot tea and down comforters.  Last night was the worst yet - we sunk to an alarming level of frump, with under armour, slippers, and fluffy bathrobes.  This is the unsexiest challenge in the history of challenges.  And I'm including pie eating in the list.

Snowy Weekend

WHAT.  For those of you who don't know where we live, we're in the 1-3" area.  I suppose we're getting off easy.  But apparently this winter is not messing around. The snow heard us taunting it with our little No Heat November game.


Jes gets to miss the fun and hang out in London until Monday, where it will be a balmy 60 degrees on Saturday.  Hope you enjoy it while you can, Jessica.  We'll have your shovel ready for you.


I had dinner with my mother last night, during which she asked me just what I was thinking.  She asked me if we couldn't afford to heat our house.  And then she told me I was nuts, and would be the first person to crack.  It was an informative 20 seconds.  No matter!  We CAN afford to heat our house.  We're just choosing not to.  It's different.  It's nuts.  She's right.


Here's hoping that wherever you are, you're getting less snow than we are! (I don't mean that.  I freaking love the snow.)